Why do we work towards permanent goals and achievements, when the only permanent thing is change?
Nothing in our lives is permanent.
As leaders, we often strive for stability, sustainability, and perpetual growth as key organizational goals. But what if these goals are ultimately fleeting and unattainable? This concept of impermanence is a tough one to integrate, especially in a world where we look towards the future and use the past to guide us.
The changing nature of business is reflected in past and current theories of leadership. Historically, a leader’s role was to maintain the status quo. Stability was considered a cost saving and energy-efficient way of doing business, and change was perceived to disrupt operations and exhaust resources. The new focus of organizations is change. Accommodating change requires more than flexibility or adaptability. Today’s leader is a “visionary” or “change agent”, who always seeks new and better ways of attaining goals by challenging current paradigms. A leader must be able to cope with a dynamic environment, but more importantly must be able to change themselves frequently in order to remain ahead of the game.
Today’s leader must embody a deep awareness that the conscious world is always changing. The mind moves through so many mental states in a day, in an hour, sometimes even in a few minutes or seconds, and can move from the distant past to the future in an instant. It is ungovernable and unreliable, and yet we try to control it and make sense of it. We can no more control it than we can control weather patterns.
We resist change and try to control because we seek permanence, but the truth is, everything changes. Resistance to change comes from a fixed mindset; it is our resistance to this impermanence and uneasiness in the face of it that, in my opinion, is fueling a lot of our current woes. Control is not the answer. Surrendering resistance is. Expecting temporary circumstances to remain permanent only serves to intensify challenges and highlights our lack of control.
We don’t mourn a beautiful flower when it drops its petals. We accept that it has bloomed, will reset, and bloom again. Yet when we have a bad day, mess up a proposal, don’t hit revenue numbers, we forget about our beautiful petals and instead focus on the loss.
Coming from a background in sales, I felt this keenly – you’re only as good as your last sale. Basketball Coach Phil Jackson said it best: “You’re only a success in the moment of the successful act, then you have to do it again”, after winning two consecutive NBA championships in the mid-1990s with the Chicago Bulls and then going for a third ring in 1998.
What would it look like if we approached the workplace with a conscious understanding that everyone, top to bottom, inside to outside, partner or competitor, is at some level suffering from the same sense of loss related to this temporary effervescence of life?
We need to understand that everyone walks the Hero’s Journey. The people you encounter every day are each living a Hero’s Journey – they are striving to find meaning while facing unexpected twists and turns of fate. Obstacles test their character, strength, skill, and resolve. Each person came into life without a name and will leave their name and body behind, yet we see the people around us as unchanging; we name them as friends or foe, as obstacles or helpers.
One of most powerful techniques I work on with my clients is to assist them to stop torturing themselves about their past failures by understanding that is not who they are today. Letting go of attachment to the past is essential to accepting impermanence.
As humans we often use blame and shame when the situation does not turn out like we hope. By holding on to hope, we actually invite suffering. Accepting impermanence reminds us that nothing lasts forever. It embraces change as a constant. We often mistakenly invest in multiple aspects of life as if they are fixed and certain such as our relationships, jobs, income, and housing. But accepting that all circumstances are subject to change, both from bad to better and from good to worse, helps us manage life’s ups and downs.
Impermanent leadership allows for the impermanence of all things. Impermanent leaders trust that the organization will survive and thrive as long as it can be of service in the world. They are willing to let go when the work of the organization is finished. They are willing to surrender their own agendas when doors close. They listen for the new when their plans fizzle. They receive what is given with humility and gratitude. Impermanence, and fully embracing it, helps leaders to realize that leadership is full of surprise, humility, humor, awe, and surrender. To embrace impermanence is to start a journey toward positive transformation.
Melissa Griffiths
Ascension, Inc.
Melissa Griffiths focuses on bottom line impact. By working directly with the leaders and teams of growing companies, Melissa combines almost 30 years of sales experience with the latest research in self-development and creative intuition to bring about positive and measurable change. Melissa founded Ascension to educate the next generation of leaders on how a balanced and coherent mind, heart, and emotions can positively impact the growth of a business. She has worked with some of the world’s largest companies to bring about lasting change and shift mindsets. Melissa is certified in HeartMath®, Emotional Resolution®, BodyTalk™ and PSYCH-K® and brings these scientifically focused modalities to her coaching.
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